DOSSIER

  05/06/2021 | Antoine PANAITE

Unlike abstinence, asexuality is not a choice but a sexual orientation. In an era of sexualized society, asexuals are often seen as marginalized. The AVEN association, a support network for asexuals, is fighting to change society's perception and gain recognition for asexuals as individuals who have neither the desire nor the need for sexual interaction.

Like heterosexuality, homosexuality, or bisexuality, asexuality is not a choice; it is a lived experience, and there is no frustration involved. Not being attracted to sexual relations is, in fact, a different kind of sexuality, just like any other. It's a different relationship with the body, since physical contact generally doesn't appeal to asexuals. But this doesn't prevent them from being in relationships! Some even have sex with their partners to please them. In short, there is no disgust for the sexual act, only a lack of desire.

In her investigative book entitled "No Sex," Peggy Sastre, a doctor of philosophy, confirms the difficulty for an asexual person to assert their identity without causing discomfort to their loved ones or society.

"It's difficult to make people understand that there's no problem, that there's no suffering. It's true that sex is a subject on which everyone has an opinion, which is generally quite normative. So, it's a coming out that doesn't happen easily, in the sense that many people who receive this coming out think, 'Are you sure? Maybe you haven't met the right person? Just wait a bit, it'll happen,' etc. What I found very interesting is that it's the same model as coming out as a homosexual."

The comparison with the homosexual community even extends to current norms in psychiatry. Currently, the new edition of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5), published by the American Psychiatric Association, the leading American and global authority on psychiatry, intends to change its position regarding asexuality. Currently, it is described as a libido disorder, a condition related to psychiatry. As a reminder, homosexuality was considered a mental illness until 1973. The fight of asexuals to change society's perception may only be beginning. However, their goal differs from that of homosexuals. They are not asking to be recognized, but simply for the right to be ignored and invisible.

  Antoine PANAITE

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